Single woman in her 40s says it was life changing

A woman who feared she would never have children after two rounds of failed IVF in her 40s has said adopting a child has changed her life.

Jo, from south Wales, registered to adopt as a single woman and welcomed her “cheeky, handsome boy” home 18 months later.

She wants others to follow suit after figures showed the number of people registering to adopt dropped in Wales.

The National Adoption Service (NAS) said between 150 and 170 adopters were being approved a year since the Covid pandemic, compared with 250 to 300 before.

Jo said she had always lived a full and happy life with friends and family, but also wanted a be a mum.

It was her dad who encouraged her to register to adopt, a process which included interviews, home visits and social workers.

She said despite the anxiety of waiting and the reservations she had being a single mother, her experience of adopting was “magical”.

“It’s not a race to get your family. This is to make your perfect family and to make sure the child is placed with you is best placed,” she said.

She added her fears disappeared the first time she met her son.

“He’s very cheeky, he’s tall, he’s super sharp, putting words together. He’s very, very clever. He’s gorgeous, very handsome.”

She said those who were considering adoption should “trust the process”.

According to NAS, there are about 200 children waiting to be adopted, with anecdotal evidence suggesting some are not registering as prospective adopters because of the cost of living.

NAS’ director, Suzanne Griffiths, said there was more work to be done, despite progress.

“We’ve achieved a lot of successes over the last 10 years, not least of all the 3,000 plus children that we’ve placed over that period of time,” she said.

“But the numbers of people expressing an interest in adoption is going down at the moment. We’re not entirely sure why, some of that will be linked to things like cost of living.”

In 2002, the law changed in the United Kingdom, allowing single people and same-sex couples to adopt children.

According to NAS, single and LGBTQ+ adopters make up 10% and a quarter of adoptions in Wales respectively.

Guto and Rhys, from Cardiff, said adopting their five-year old boy had brought joy to their lives.

“The past three years have been fantastic,” said Guto.

“When I was coming out and coming to terms with my own sexuality, it was following same sex couples being able to get married and it was during the time that adoption became an option.

“Seeing that and coming to terms with my own sexuality, I was able to envisage myself being able to adopt.”

Guto added being able to share their journey with other same-sex couples has been “fantastic”.

“It’s changed our lives immeasurably, really. Our lives have been totally transformed.”